Networking

2 X 3 Top Networking Communication Tips

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How would you rate your networking communication skills?

Do you enjoy connecting with other people at these types of events, or are you one of those folks for whom networking events are pain and torture?

Do you sometimes feel uncomfortable, even sleazy when conversing with other people at what is supposed to be an opportunity to connect with them?

Or do you just avoid them completely, even though you know they might help you to build your business and increase your income?

If any of these scenarios apply to you, I invite you to take a few minutes to watch this edition of Public Speaking Tips & Tricks, where I discuss 3 sets of 2 tips to make your networking experiences change from negative to positive.

Please be sure to share your thoughts, plus any other concerns you may have; so that I can address them in future editions of this series.

3 Key Networking Mindsets for Business Success

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Of all the public speaking opportunities available to us, the one that many people feel most uncomfortable with is networking.

This discomfort can occur at official networking events, in casual conversations that happen during breaks at conferences and meetings, and even in social conversations.

Presentations and speeches are prepared in advance. Sales calls are often scripted; but networking requires seat-of-the-pants flexibility and a go-with-the-flow mentality to be successful.

How can you share what you do in a way that engages people rather than turns them off? When is the right time to tell people what you do, and when is the right time to button your lip?

Here are 3 key mindsets that can serve as guidelines for more successful networking results:

1. Set the right intentions before you arrive

Unfortunately many people have the notion that the purpose of networking is to sell people your product, service or opportunity. Focusing mainly on this is a guaranteed recipe for failure.

Not only will you feel uncomfortably pushy, but you will turn potential customers and referral partners off right out of the box by coming across as only interested in your own success.

Instead, set the intention to build relationships with the people whom you meet.

In addition, you can also set a specific goal to meet and get the business cards of 2 or 3 new people, and a second goal to reconnect with 2 or 3 people whom you have met at prior events.

2. Ask and listen, then ask and listen again, before sharing what you do

When someone asks you what you do, instead of jumping right into your standard elevator pitch (which often ends up sounding stilted and unconvincing), ask a question that specifically targets the pain points and problems that you help people to solve in your work.

For example, I often ask people this question: Have you ever been in a situation where you really wanted to say something effectively, but you either weren’t sure what to say, or how to say it, or were afraid to say it?

If someone answers with a yes, then I follow up with one of the following questions: How did that make you feel? or What was the result of not being able to do that?

If the person with whom you are speaking has the problem that you help to solve, you can then mention that you might be able to help with that problem, and suggest setting a time to chat about the possibilities.

It is crucial that you get the commitment for a follow-up conversation right then (and even set the appointment if possible), so that you have a legitimate reason to give that person a call. You can then come across as providing a service, rather than being viewed as a pushy salesperson.

3. The fortune is in the follow up

Once you find someone whom you might serve, and who is open to speaking with you, be sure to follow up with a phone call and chat.

Added touches include sending a note indicating that you enjoyed meeting this person and look forward to connecting with him or her soon. A hand-written note sent through the mail is particularly powerful.

Inviting that person to connect on LinkedIn is another way to build a stronger relationship with someone whom you have just met. Remember to publish any articles you write on LinkedIn, as all the people with whom you are connected on the first level will receive a notice that you have shared an article on LinkedIn.

Repurposing your content this way is an excellent way to establish yourself as an expert in your field, and to continually remind your first degree connections of who you are and how you serve people.

As an additional piece of networking strategy, check out my recent blog post on how to graciously ask for referrals without stepping on any toes.

P.S. If you would like a quickie review of the key points of how to describe what you do when you get to that part of the conversation, you can access my free report on How to Instantly and Powerfully Answer the What Do You Do? Question at http://howdoyouanswer.com.

How to Graciously Ask for a Referral without Putting Anybody on the Spot

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So there you are at a networking event or in a social situation, and someone asks you that dreaded question, So what do you do?

Maybe you are past the point of dreading that question (which is another subject altogether), and you can handle the answer with confidence and ease.

Whatever your answer may be, what’s the next best way to follow up on your answer? It is not to ask for a sale!

The quickest way to turn off anyone who has expressed interest (especially merely polite, conversational interest) in what you do, is to go into sales mode. That is not the way to make friends and influence people (to borrow Dale Carnegie’s famous phrase).

Yet, you still want to open the door to possible business and possible referrals for your business. How can you possibly do that without making people feel uncomfortable in your presence?

Here’s my handy hint on how to do it without sounding like a high pressure sales person and without putting anyone on the spot. 

Follow up with what I have named a Soft Referral Request.

Simply ask this question as a throw-away question, as it were, in a very casual and conversational tone of voice.

By the way, do you happen to know anyone who might possibly be interested in my service/product/whatever?

Then be quiet! Do not say a single word. Let the other person process your request. Remember the cardinal rule when asking for a sale: The person who speaks first loses.

There are four possible outcomes to this very polite, yet powerful question:

  1. The person with whom you are talking says that he or she could really use what you are offering. (Home run!)
  2. That person gives you a referral to someone who may be interested in what you are offering. You might even get an introduction right on the spot. (Third base!)
  3. The person expresses no interest either way. (Strike out!)
  4. Even if that person expresses no interest, you have planted a seed that could possibly sprout into a referral at some future date. (First base!)

Warning: It virtually impossible to use the Soft Referral Request effectively if you come across as either needy or pushy. That is why your tone of voice is so crucial to the effectiveness of this strategy.

The beauty of the Soft Referral Request is that it can be applied to a variety of situations in which you find yourself, some of which have absolutely nothing to do with business. It can help to grease the conversational wheels in your personal life as well.

Compare the relationship implications of the following two questions:

  1. Do you happen to have any thoughts about what we should do about whatever?
  2. What have you decided about this something that affects both of us?

Along those lines, I would certainly love to hear your thoughts and any experiences you might have in applying the strategy of the Soft Referral Request.

Want to know where the holes are in your business?
Take our free Assessment to Predict Your Business Success

2 Seconds Critical to Your Success

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You never get a second chance to make a good first impression is a truth that has been around for a long time.

This is certainly the case when you are giving a presentation of any sort, are attending a networking event, or even calling someone on the phone.

If you don’t immediately engage the attention of your audience (even an audience of one) in a positive way, it is almost impossible to elicit favorable attention later on (unless you are good at doing back flips across the stage).

What was truly stunning to me to learn, however, is when and how long a time it actually takes for that first impression to be made.

Contrary to common belief, it is not when you start your presentation. It is not even during the brief pause you take to connect visually with the people to whom you are addressing your remarks.

In an article in Entrepreneur magazine, Vanessa Van Edwards reports on the results of a study done by researchers Nalini Ambady and Robert Rosenthal, on when and exactly how long it takes for people to gain their first impression of someone.

People gain their first impressions of others in the first 2 seconds they see them, not hear them, simply see them! And these impressions stick, no matter what else these people do afterwards.

It’s as if, once people make up their minds about you, that’s it!

The good news is that you can very strategically choose how you show up in those first 2 seconds.

Do you enter a room or walk on stage drooping and looking disgruntled, or do you arrive smiling (or at least looking pleasantly authoritative) and standing tall?

It’s your choice.

Choose to show up fully, and that will set you up both for reducing any nervousness you may be feeling, and also for projecting an aura of success right out of the gate.

If you would like to discuss how I might be of assistance to you in enjoying the success that can rightfully be yours, simply sign up for a VIP Chat with  me here.

Network with Ease Using These 3 Business Networking Tips

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Strassenschild 22b - DialogWalking into a room filled with strangers and near-strangers, and expecting oneself to carry on effective business building conversations, is not most people’s idea of a fun time.

And yet that type of business networking is precisely what business people often need to do in order to meet those people who are key to enabling them to reach their income and business building goals.

So if you are one of the many who are not comfortable going to networking meetings, but know you need to do it anyway; here are 3 business networking tips to help you become both more comfortable and more effective in networking situations.

You may be surprised to find out that an effective elevator pitch is not one of the tips I am going to share; since that is often the first thing people are taught to develop – a short promotional answer to the What do you do? question.

Tip #1 – You are NOT there to sell! You are there to build relationships.

Even if you have the world’s best elevator pitch (or marketing message, as I prefer to call it), flinging it into every conversation at the first possible moment is a good way to come across as pushy, salesy and someone to be avoided.

Wait to be asked before you go into your song and dance. Getting business through networking is a long term strategy that requires patience, something those of us who live in Instant America are not thrilled to hear.

Tip #2 – Focus on the other person, not on yourself.

This tip relates to tip #1 in that it helps you to build relationships. Be truly interested in the people you meet. Ask them what they do; then ask follow-up questions, both to show interest in what they are saying, and also to further clarify if there is some basis for the two of you to connect further.

Chances are, once you have questioned other people this way, they will ask you similar questions in return.

This is the perfect time to share your marketing message, but please, please, please, not in a rote, memorized fashion that leaches all interest and value out of the information you are sharing. You need to animatedly communicate your own belief in the importance of what you offer the world.

Tip #3 – Come from a place of service.

Be a business matchmaker. Ask people what or whom they are looking for; so that you can put people together when possible. This gives you the opportunity to ask people for their cards and for permission to write what they are looking for on the back of the card. (Ask permission, only because some peole hate to see their cards get written on. Save your writing for after the event if necessary.)

Bonus Tip – Follow up, follow up, follow up!

A strong business relationship is not built on one conversation at one event (or even several events). Here are some ideas for you to consider:

  1. Send an email (or better yet, a personal, hand-written note) referring to your meeting and something in your conversation.
  2. Invite the person to join your LinkedIn network.
  3. If this is someone with whom you wish to connect on a more serious level, invite that person to meet you for coffee or for lunch.

The end result of these tips my surprise you. When you focus all of your attention on getting to know other people, there won’t be much attention left for you to give to any nerves you may have experienced walking in the door.

As an added bonus, these tips work just as well for conversations on the phone as they do for conversations held in person.

Paying careful attention to another person is a very sincere form of flattery; and most people you meet will not only eat it up, they will tend to regard you very highly as well.

So go forth, network, and enjoy the positive results you garner over time from these business networking tips!

Answering a Most Dangerous Question

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Closeup of young man not listeningDo you hem and haw when you meet someone new who asks you what you do?

When you try to explain what you do, do you ever feel that your answer lands on deaf ears?

If you go to a marketing event with the idea of sharing information about your business, do you feel like you are either turning people off or boring them to death?

Or do you avoid networking events for any of the above reasons?

Becoming the effective messenger of your own message is one of the most important marketing skills you can learn; and yet this type of communication skill is hardly ever mentioned in the context of a marketing strategy.

Sure, we are told to go to networking events; but unless we have a successful strategy once we are there, a deadly combination of lack of skill, compounded by social anxiety, can scuttle our best attempts to connect effectively with people.

So here is one practical business networking tip that you can apply whenever anyone asks you what you do.

Don’t start the first sentence of your reply with the words, “I am …..”

It’s too easy to come across as arrogant or a braggart (and to feel uncomfortable with what you are saying) when you start talking about yourself.

Instead, change the entire focus of your reply from yourself to the people whom you help or serve.

Start your sentences with the words, “I work with …..” or “I help …..”

The rest of your sentences can then include the following 4 elements:

1.  Whom you help
2.  The problem you solve for them
3.  The solution your offer
4.  How the solution benefits them

For example, when people ask me what I do, I say something along these lines:

“I work with people who are nervous about using public speaking, networking and talking on the phone to promote themselves and their business, with the result that their income suffers. I help them to develop their own powerful message, and to gain confidence and ease in sharing it; so that they can attract their ideal clients, and exponentially increase their income.”

Please notice that I say something along these lines. I do not memorize a specific sentence. Unless you are a great actor, a memorized sentence (or elevator pitch, as it is often called) sounds stilted, inauthentic; and, unfortunately, boring. I’m a trained voice actor, and I bore myself if I use a canned response.

Instead, remember this important business networking tip. If you focus on remembering your 4 key points, you are much more likely to be able to use some or all of them to give an appropriate and effective answer when someone asks you what you do.

Please share your favorite method of answering the What do you do? question, and if my suggestions are helpful to you.