There has been a lot of buzz in recent years about the importance of emotional intelligence (EI). In his article in Inc., John Rampton includes a compelling quote from Psychology Today:
“Emotional intelligence is the ability to identify and manage your own emotions and the emotions of others.” This usually involves:
1. Emotional awareness, which includes the ability to identify your own emotions as well as those of others;
2. The ability to harness emotions and apply them to tasks such as problem solving;
3. The ability to manage your emotions, such as being able to calm down when you’re upset.”
That is all well and good, but leaves at least some of us wondering:
Might there possibly be a way to improve our own emotional intelligence quotient; so that we ourselves can benefit from its gifts?
Fortunately John suggests 10 qualities that we can work on to improve our emotional intelligence. Among my favorites (and frankly the ones I need the most) are:
- They are not perfectionists. (OY!)
- They know how to balance work and play. (Double OY!)
- They focus on the positive. (Doing pretty well there.)
- They set boundaries. (Still working on it.)
I particular like what the author shares about setting boundaries:
“While people with high EI may seem like pushovers because of their politeness and compassion, they actually have the power to establish boundaries.
For example, they know how to say no to others. The reason? It prevents them from getting overwhelmed, burned out, and stressed because they have too many commitments.”
To check out the rest of the list and what John has to say about each item, click here.
I feel that is all about the meaning one gives to the emotions when I come across someone who could trigger me, I use a tool IPOV meaning interesting point of view that you have then it does not go into me it is just an interesting IPOV
Dear Kyera, what an incredibly intelligent way for you to put some emotional distance between yourself and other people’s statements and opinions that can trigger an unpleasant emotional response.
It’s also a way to show respect for other people, even when you disagree with something they’ve said.
One can also follow the advice of the great sage Ben Zoma who taught: “Who is wise? He who learns from everyone.”